The Sexting Revolution
Just like all true bestfriends, my best lemon and I share everything... Well except men, that's not best friendship, that's just being a bitch.... Of course if you and your bestie have some sort of arrangement there, well no judgement 🙌🏼
Anyway, I was having one of those days, you know the ones, where you run out of Internet credit on your phone and you were busy stalking on Instagram, or whatever? And so you need to immediately continue of course? So naturally I borrowed my besties phone (with her permission - I have some respect)...
Obviously she is the more organised and responsible one in this partnership, the one who recharged... I entered her passcode (which of course I know) and jumped straight back on Instagram and continued my browsing/stalking. I had only had her phone for about 1 minute when it vibrated and a message alert appeared at the top of the screen... Now let me say, I have a strict DO NOT READ OTHER PEOPLE'S MESSAGES rule, but I didn't exactly have time to think it through and I read the small sample of her message from a boys name of whom I had not heard from...
It's important at this moment to mention, that my bestie is definitely what I would call the more 'conservative' one, don't get me wrong, she's not boring, the girl can drink tequila like its water and bust a serious move on the dance floor... But when it came to boys, I was probably the more, let's use the word 'outgoing' one... Or so I thought! Back to the sample of that message... Well let's just say, from that moment on, I would never be able to look at my bestie with innocent eyes, the message that came through was the most erotic and dirty message I have ever read! After gathering myself, I walked back to my bestfriends room... "Thanks for letting me borrow that, you got a message" I said to her. "Cool, no worries" she replied. "You got an interesting message... And I didn't mean to read part of it, but..." Before I could continue, her face froze. She knew what I was talking about...
After several days of alternating between making jokes about her message (what are best friends for?) and begging to read the conversation... She'd had enough tequila to finally let me! I also had to remind her that although I was making fun, I was incredibly proud. She gave me her phone, went to the bar to get another drink, and I read. Woah 😳
It took me a good 5-10 minutes to get through the messages, it was so insanely sexual. When I finished the messages, it took me a second to gather myself, I was completely shocked, surprised, and just a little turned on! When I looked up at her, she had a strange expression, as though she was ready for me to give her some really bad news...
"You gotta teach me your skills!" I said instead! "How the F do you do that?! I'm afraid to even say dick, or nipple in a message... Even for a good joke!" She laughed at me, and then said "oh, it's easy 💁🏼 " (umm yeah okay?!). So this is where it all began for me, this is where I learnt how to sext! And I've got to admit, I never EVER thought this was something I could do, turns out... It's pretty fun 🙊 all you need is the right advice (she still helps me from time to time)... So here is her advice, every dirty but of it 😘 enjoy
😏 Rule 1
Who, When and Where - The main rules...Who? Personally I think it is important to make sure it is someone you have already had sex with - no room for weird surprises , (now I've broken that rule before and it didn't end well for me personally) but sexing someone you've never met can also be a great way to advance your skills and allow you to indulge in fantasies that you may, or may not want to try in reality (it was definitely great for my bestie - now an advanced sexter). It does however make it more fun when you have other events to base your narratives on. When Where? Whenever/where-ever the creative juices take you! A sneaky message while he's at work, a naughty message to send him off to sleep with some very explicit imagery... But be somewhat discreet, you don't want to be that guy on the train who was watching an all male orgy without his headphones on. The one who continued to watch even when me and my boyfriend sat down next to him. Yes that actually happened.
👙 Rule 2
Just don't say anything in sexy that you're not comfortable doing in person... in the words of Jay Z 🎶 couldn't talk about it if you ain't lived it 🎶 😂 but then again if you have a fantasy that you want to be tied up and hung from the ceiling in a sex dungeon (and you're willing to follow through) you go right ahead and tell them that - just make sure you've built up to that.
This just makes sure that after all the build up and sexual tension, when you get together in person there isn't an awkward moment of... "are you sure you don't want (insert insane thing you thought up when you were drunk, because you thought it sounded sexy) ...because you said when we were texting that...blah blah blah" and in your head your thinking... SHIT SHIT SHIT....
The great thing about this is that if you are 100% realistic with your sexts, everything is on the table (quite literally if thats your thing) and if you have followed Rule 1 you can bring up new ideas, and your partner can make them happen and surprise you with them 😏 Which leads me to...
👅 Rule 3
Be selfless and selfish...Think about your partner and think about yourself... What do you like? What do they like? Make it happen!... for example if he like Blow jobs, which I'm going to assume he does, most men do and if they don't they are probably all sorts of fucked up or lying... you could imply you are going to blow him in the shower next time you see him, if thats what you want to do... (👄 🍌 🚿 💦) < really just the emojis should do it... he'll get the hint. Imply whatever they want and as a compromise tell them what you want in return.
😉 Rule 4
Now how do you word it? - the narrative... close your eyes.... how does it start? write that down!... What happens next? write that down! you get the idea. The main idea is for them to paint the picture in their mind , from your words. It is a great way for them to get really involved in your sexting and they can fill in any blanks with whatever they want. the key here is to extend your sexting for as long as possible, you want to build up the sexual tension, tease them and play out everything of what you want to do in your mind and then in text. Just make sure you don't get too carried away, you want just enough to keep them thinking about you all day. So that the main event will still be when you next see each other!
Pro tip: you can each take turns at texting what comes next (no pun intended 🙈 ). Leave a ... For him to continue the story... Or finish with some emojis, they tell the story, but they're also open to a little interpretation
🍆 Rule 5
If you cant put it into words use an image, this is my favourite tip! A picture can say a thousand words (just check out our 3 ways to up your sexting game article), but I'm not talking your naked bathroom selfies (just don't, phone hacking and snapchat leak. Need I say more?), and thats even if your partner keeps the picture to themselves. Im talking Emojis! Gifs, Bitmoji's even links to your favourite internet pages could be great, if your into that. Anything that will spark their imagination and you can say "we're going to do this later 😉 " would be great!
Good luck, don't scare them too much with your super advanced sexting techniques...
Also, you can always tell them you learnt them from @ohsweetlemon - not your previous lover, - show them this article if they don't believe you, because maybe they'll learn something too !!!!
